Tag Archives: trials

Toward Release

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What does it look like when someone trusts Jesus?  What does it look like when they put all their confidence in the power of Christ to save?

Polycarp was burned at the stake.  But when he was encouraged to run and hide from his captors, instead he invited them to a dinner in his home.  Later he said, “80 and 6 years he has served me well why should I deny him now”.

Legend has it that Peter was crucified upside down, hardly feeling worthy to suffer as his master did.  But readily willing to suffer for the one he loved.

Apparently the Apostle John was boiled in oil before he was banished to the Isle of Patmos.  In that place he told us in writing about the beauty of the living God’s Holy Son.

There is a story of a mother and her two daughters who were captured by the Romans.  On the journey to Rome, understanding that they were beautiful women, the mother fained a desire to bathe before entrance to Rome.  A raging Creek was near, so the Romans let them go and bathe.  At the side of the torrent she grabbed her two daughters and through all of them into the raging river, choosing to drown rather than be molested by vulgar men (and this for the sake of purity in regard to the name of Jesus).

If I had time I could fill up far more than 100 thick volumes of testimonies.  Even today there are stories of people who are suffering brutally because they trust Jesus.  Beheadings, burnings, stabbings, and on and on.

I knew at least one faithful loving Christian, who up into his eighties, loved the Lord more than anything else in the world.  Even to his death bed he waved us away lest we interfere with his communion.

“If you love me you will obey my commands.” 

“Never will I leave you or forsake you.”

Such a short few years we are asked to trust him like this. 

Then FREEDOM!

Refinement Requires All!

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What have I learned from the past month?  I’ve learned that if I wish to obey the Lord in certain issues it will take everything I am.

I believed I was told to accomplish a personal refinement.  Through a week and a half I allowed myself to endure for His name sake.  For the next three weeks I suffered under horrible desires.  I watched curiously as my mind and body screamed to partake, lest this refinement became more powerful than they.  Anger, confusion, the seeds of hatred germinating, and complete frustration (almost to the point where I couldn’t control the sound  of my voice betraying my inner turmoil.)

Then finally came the wall.  Continue to endure under this pressure and become an angry man, or relent for a while and regroup later.  I have chosen the latter for a while.  So what have I learned?   Did I give up only to never try again?  Am I under a curse because I wasn’t prepared to endure?  I am compelled by the Love of God in Christ Jesus to say “no.”

I have learned that, while salvation by the blood of Jesus is offered to all who believe, there is an “extra” offered to every believer.  The cost of this “extra” is enormous!  And it will cost us the following:  Dedication toward accomplishment regardless the experience.  Continual honor given to the One who calls us toward what is Holy.  A willingness to suffer beyond our perceived ability to endure.  And, quite possibly, a willingness to abandon our present life’s duties for a season.

I said to myself, “You have what it takes.  Why are you faltering like this?”  But what was I to do with the building anxiety, anger, frustration, and lack of will?  I consider that I might have succeeded if I had just pushed one more day.  But what I have done is what I did. 

The glory due those who wash their robes in the blood of the Lamb is well earned.  Those who over come will be blessed with honor, as the One who bestows this honor is blessed with eternal joy.  Yet, there will be few who find that honor bestowed upon them.  Why?  precisely for the experience I related above.  The battle is harsh and demanding.  And I now know how horrible the battle can become.  And after typing that last sentence, I laugh at myself.  What do I know of suffering for the sake of His Holy Name?

Father in Heaven; Holy Father of Life and life,  I give you praise for the intense place of testing You have created for man.  And I give You Glory for the Perfection of Your Holy Son!  What wonders and marvelous power He embodies!  That He should suffer without fault in this place where I now walk (or crawl on my belly).  You are Glorious!  And Your way is above us as the farthest star in the universe is removed from the chair I now sit in.  May Your Holy Will be done forever!  You Are God!

By His Grace.